From HBR - how to recover from being fired

This post from John Beeson on the HBR Blog Network has some good advice on bouncing back from losing your job:

You've just received word that you've been fired. Or perhaps the company has gone through a re-structuring and eliminated your job — and you've been told that none of the managers you've worked with over the years have a position for you on their team. This comes as a shock to your system, especially if you've enjoyed a record of success up to this point in your career. While there are some practical things to attend to — negotiating your severance, signing up references, and agreeing with the company on a storyline about the reason for your exit — your most important action item is managing your own attitude to the situation....

As you dust yourself off, think through those parts of the situation you need to own. In a highly emotional state, it's too easy for you to curse the darkness: "I had a bad boss." "The place was rife with organizational politics." "My colleagues were non-cooperative and had it in for me." There may be some truth to this, but you also need to ask yourself, "What do I need to accept about the experience to avoid making the same mistakes so I can succeed in the future?"

Losing your job is a very particular type of failure. It's likely the most emotionally painful event of your career. Analyzing your role in the situation is not natural; you will want instead to lash out and place blame on others (as Beeson writes, this may very well be the case), or to fall into a funk of despair. But to bounce back, better to "own" the outcome and figure out what lessons you can take into the rest of your career.

Arts executive's key lesson: How to fail

From the New York Times interview of Francesca Zambello, director of the Glimmerglass Festival. The interview was conducted by Adam Bryant.

Q. Other broad insights you’ve gained over the course of your career?

A. You have to learn how to fail. You have to understand that in any position where you’re at the top, you will fail, and if you don’t fail, you’re probably not that good. So you have to learn how to cope with that. The more you get knocked down, the more you learn how to pick yourself up. It’s like a boxer. In your 20s, you’ll feel devastated when somebody fires you. I’ve been fired a number of times in my life and then rehired by a better company or given a better job. In a way, one of the things I respect the most about businesses is that when they fire somebody, they’re gone the next day. One of the problems you sometimes see in the arts is that they fire leaders but it drags on.

Former Campbell CEO Conant learns lessons from his long-ago firing

Douglas Conant, the recently-retired CEO of the Campbell Soup Company, posted on the HBR Blog Network last week about his early-career firing and what he learned from it. He describes in devastating language the feelings of that moment:

I was greeted by the Acting Vice President of Marketing and asked to step into his office. Our company had recently changed ownership and things had been a little chaotic, but I still felt good about my ability to contribute. But once I was in the Vice President's office, I learned that my position had been eliminated — and that I needed to pack up my belongings and leave the building immediately. In other words, I was fired. Ten years of my career was over in a snap. I was devastated and I was bitter. I went home to my wife, my two very small children, and my one very large mortgage... feeling every bit the victim.

But like us all, Conant possesses the ability to bounce back. Now, decades after the event, he sees how that process was a turning point, and he points to one reason - the outplacement counselor he worked with after his firing became an important mentor and teacher:

Neil was a wonderful, crusty New Englander who didn't tolerate a "victim" mentality for a minute. With Neil's guidance, losing my job became a valuable learning experience about what leadership should be. For some, these thoughts may constitute a "blinding glimpse of the obvious." But I have found them extraordinarily powerful in their simplicity.

First, I learned the power of connecting with people by being fully present — in every moment. Neil's first words to me were "How can I help?" During every one of our meetings, he listened so intently and earnestly. He wasn't trying to guide the conversation and he was not at all judgmental. His interest clearly came from a genuine desire to understand and to help. Neil was fully present in every moment, in a sincere and earnest way....

[Second,] before I was fired, I had kept my head down and on my work. As a result, I was sadly disconnected to the business world beyond the company. I felt remarkably alone.

Neil told me to build a network of people to solicit ideas and advice for my job search. Then I was to cultivate that network with the hope of identifying some job opportunities and using some of these people as my references. The time to build a network is always before you need one. It took me an extra six months to find a job because I had to build a network from scratch before I could really ramp up my search for a job.

These are powerful lessons that I've had to learn myself (much like Conant, the hard way). I wish I had read this ten years ago!

Taking too long to get rid of the "Brilliant Jerk"

This is an amazing story from Cliff Oxford in the New York Times You're The Boss blog.

I had a brilliant start-up talent when I was building my company, STI Knowledge, into a global brand. When we hired him, we hired over our heads. He had juice. We marveled at his manic performance, which often propelled all of us. When we had a crisis, he could solve it. Yes, he could have taken bigger jobs at bigger salaries but he chose to work with rebels. He knew we were right in our vision and mission, and he knew we could not do it without him. But in trying to maintain his glory, he struggled to let us go and grow.

The growth phase required the addition of staff members, systems and structure that changed the dynamics of the company. While the brilliant talent was a high-tech genius, the new stars were being made in areas like sales, marketing and education. He felt left out. He was no longer needed in every meeting. He could not simply pop into the chief executive’s office four or five times a day like old times, and the new processes and systems hindered and even prevented him from being the savior. Right before our eyes, the brilliant talent became the Brilliant Jerk.

I have listened to Brilliant Jerks proclaim, “I am the one who is always on call, who drives the most revenue, who is here on weekends and who has the knowledge.” And the Brilliant Jerk speaks the truth. But I have also seen him stick his head in the door and deflate an entire management team. A growth company needs enablers, not disablers....

So what’s the right answer? Get rid of the Brilliant Jerk as fast as you possibly can.

The biggest waste of time in a high-growth company is the period that falls between when you know someone does not fit the growth culture and the time you terminate the relationship. On average, I’d say the Brilliant Jerk hangs around for 1.5 years; decisive action can limit the period to less than six months. The likes of Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Roger Ailes have had no problem showing Brilliant Jerks the door, and all built world-class brands faster and better than the rest of us. I wish I could tell you I was as tough as those guys. I learned the hard way by not taking action when I should have.

I can tell you from personal experience that coddling the Brilliant Jerk — letting him work from home, consoling him, giving him special assignments — does not work. It just kicks the can down the road. At my company, I was worried about the impact his firing would have on other employees who had shown him respect. To my surprise, the reaction was, “What took you so long?”

One of the worst feelings I have ever experienced was looking at the Brilliant Jerk and saying, “We have a vision, and I have decided you are no longer a match for where we need to go.” One of the best feelings came the next day when everyone was moving forward together.

I have had the weird experience of feeling terrible about firing an employee, then having the other employees telling me the next day, "What took you so long?" A further regret is that this employee wasn't even brilliant!

Elizabeth Sosnow: What I Learned From Getting Fired

This story is from Elizabeth Sosnow, Managing Director of BlissPR, and was first published in the BlissPR blog.

In this story, she recounts early lessons from getting fired from a summer job, and picking up a new one. [Elizabeth's dad is John Bliss, who has contributed several stories to this site.] Thanks to Elizabeth for allowing us to reprint it here.



What I Learned from Getting Fired…or, How to Start Becoming a Boss

I was fired once.

I was seventeen years old, working for a gift store in my home town. My job was to be a “jack of all trades,” from running errands to wrapping gifts to encouraging customers to make a purchase. I was speedy at errands, terrible at gift wrapping and mediocre at sales.

Meanwhile, my employer was running out of money, dodging creditors and avoiding invoices. My job began to include answering angry calls while she hid. Looking back, I can see that my boss had no time to be kind to a teenager…her professional life was falling apart.

My one bright spot that summer? My daily walk to buy a sandwich at the deli across the street. The owners were unfailingly kind to me, with a friendly hello or a warm word.

The busiest day of the summer arrived – the annual “sidewalk sale” where retailers unloaded their old inventory for low prices. My boss had me running for 12 hours straight. My high point was selling a pair of very expensive cubic zirconia earrings during the rush – my biggest sale ever.

But when the hordes cleared, she pulled me into her office and fired me on the spot. I was devastated.

After taking the weekend to lick my wounds, I realized I wanted to say goodbye to the deli owners. Somehow, they had become my friends. I just couldn’t disappear without a word, even though I was ashamed to tell them what had happened. I knew I wasn’t blameless – there are always two people involved.

I walked in to the deli, admitted what had happened…and they offered me a job on the spot. Not only that, it was at a higher salary for a shorter work day. They told me they’d always liked me, and they knew I wouldn’t let them down. I was stunned.
I worked at the deli for two summers and loved every minute. Honestly, I probably did let them down sometimes, but I’m also pretty sure they didn’t regret the job offer.
They taught me a little lesson on how to be a good employer virtually every day, including:

Set Fair Boundaries – and Stick to Them: How about the week that I strolled in 15 minutes late for four days in a row? They simply smiled and docked my pay for an hour. I was never late again.

Pay Attention to Individual Needs: The deli wasn’t always a hot bed of creativity. It was my job to draw up the “daily sandwich specials” sheet. Every day, I got more elaborate with it — more doodles, more colors, etc. They weren’t annoyed. Instead, they were patient…and only drew the line when my masterpieces started to consume more than 20 minutes of time.

You Need to Understand Who an Employee “Is,” While They Figure Out “Who They will Be:” One young male customer became increasingly interested in me. After one date, I knew he wasn’t for me. But he kept coming into the deli and I didn’t know how to handle the aggressive attention. Instead of being irritated with me, they let me hide in the back of the store one day, even though it left them short-handed up front. Maturity takes time, and people don’t “grow up” all at once, even in a terrific work environment.

Helped Me Begin to Understand Responsibility for Others: The deli had a number of refrigerated cases to hold all of the cold cuts, cheese and salads. During my second summer, I was promoted to “Manager” of the other summer employees. One of my responsibilities was to make sure that all of the doors to the cases stayed firmly shut, so the cold air stayed inside and the food stayed fresh. Well…the doors were sticky and didn’t slide shut easily. After warning me to keep an eye on it several times, my boss calmly started docking me (and only me) a quarter every time he found the door open. Simply put, I earned a higher wage than the others and therefore more was expected of me. End of story.

Now that I’m a boss myself, I try to remember the lessons that all three of those folks taught me that summer. Perhaps, in the end, it boils down to each of us understanding that the employer-employee relationship is a very much a two-way street.

What about you? What have you learned from a boss or an employee in the past? What kind of advice would you offer to a seventeen year old just starting out in the workforce?

Michael Bloomberg recalls being fired 30 years ago

TechCrunch's "Founder Stories" series recently presented an interview with Mayor Michael Bloomberg of New York City. Mayor Bloomberg is a highly successful tech entrepreneur as well as a 3-term mayor of the Big Apple. He discusses the role of hard work, as well as luck (he mentions luck twice), in his success.

While I was watching the interview, I thought about this quote from Paul Schoemaker: "The school of hard knocks is a great teacher, even if the tuition is very high, precisely because the lessons make such a deep imprint." At least three times in the interview Mayor Bloomberg refers to his being fired from Salomon Brothers more than 30 years earlier. In spite of his subsequent triumphs, the occasion of his firing still gnaws at him, still gives him something to prove. Here's the entire interview:



You can find Mayor Bloomberg's story of his firing in this excerpt of "Bloomberg by Bloomberg" from the New York Times.

"You can't fire me - you don't even work here!"

Another story from entrepreneur and venture capitalist Albert Wenger:

I know of a subsequently very successful entrepreneur who in the early days of his first company was so mortified of having to fire someone that he sent in his wife instead to do it. When the employee in question caught on to what was happening, he said to the wife: “You can’t fire me, you don’t even work here” to which she apparently replied “yes, that’s the point — neither do you.” The next day the entrepreneur decided he needed to hire a right hand person who could help with this going forward!

I hope this entrepreneur eventually got the courage to do difficult tasks like this himself. However, I'm very impressed with his wife--there's no doubt about her courage!

Albert Wenger: when you have to fire someone, don't dither

This story is from entrepreneur and venture capitalist Albert Wenger's blog Continuations:

Firing is probably the hardest thing to do and I was terrible at it at first as an entrepreneur. I put off firing my first mis-hire (a developer) for weeks while I was looking for ways to fix a situation that couldn’t and shouldn’t have been salvaged. There were (and often are) difficult additional considerations such as the employee’s personal financial situation. In the end once I had done it the impact on team morale and productivity was tremendous and I realized I had dithered. A tough lesson to learn and while firing never got any emotionally easier for me at least I knew not to let it drag.

There are a lot of hiring stories on the site but many fewer firing stories. People have to be fired on occasion and doing it properly is difficult. But, as Albert writes later in his post, "Always keep in mind that much as the firing may be difficult for you, it is more difficult for the person being fired and putting it off or doing it in a disrespectful fashion only makes matters worse." I've been on both sides of the "firing line" and I can tell you that Albert speaks the truth.